I have more then 12 cousin in my family and this actually come from my dad side only by not add from my mom side. In this case, we are quite close with each other and we share and gathered for special occasion and create bonding closer.
When we talk about marriage, some of us will married by following the turn. Start with my eldest brother who is the eldest among the cousin, then my sis cousin sha , the 3rd sis cousin lanie and then followed by my 2nd brother which on fourth and the 5th is cousin boy. This is the first batch of Grandson of Nik Jaafar (my grand dad's name)
Then my batch that consist of my cousin mus, me, cousin tahir and cousin Is. I guess my batch kind of weird cause cousin mus still don't know his direction with marriage and me also don't know what to say about marriage. So in this case people start to asked when is our time or in a hidden word
" Bila nak makan nasi minyak nie?" from our relatives, friends and anybody when they knew that we have yet getting married. We just can only smile.
Mom start to announce to the whole world about my single hood and promote me to any of her friends, relative if there any "
anak dara sunti" to match make with me. Even this activity been support by my friends and provoke by my younger brother indeed. Same goes happen to my cousin Mus.
Both of us just can only smile, dont know what to answer of the single hood title that we are holding rite now. Then suddenly news of my cousin Tahir (mus brother) want to get married. Am just glad that he get married and the ceremony went well at Terengganu with 1 breath (satu nafas lafaz).
To be frank, i don't know what is my fate about my marriage. I still don't have any idea what is look like and i kind of scared to face this situation. Am ok with the relationship, but then i don't know how can i coupe with the other family plus with the incident happen of family break up, the kids, the crime and child kidnap, the financial with in this world of money, the cheat by any parties of the marriage institution and many more.
As a human, i never had a marriage dream ever since i start to know that i already turn to a teenager. My friends did tell me that they do have the wet dream, marriage dream and any normal wet dream scene. Unlike me ( dunno whether lucky or not lucky) i never had. Maybe i thinking too much or exaggerated.
I personally would like to get married if am ready for it. I dont want to get married if people asked me to do so, or because other people already getting married and i need to do the same thing. Marriage is very sacred to me cause its really huge thing. Its the life, future, love, generation and sacrifice you dealing with. I hate to see the marriage broke on the way when suddenly one parties said they are not happy anymore with their partner or cause of cheat or involve of other parties.
Of all the sinned that i have done, i dont want to create more and cause more. I dont want to be like some people who just marriage to cover from who he is before or what he is now. I dont want to married cause of 3 little alphabets cause with this 3 little alphabets can cause sinned and blessing to the Almighty.
My idea or marriage is Love, share talk, know each other, never ending feeling love and hugging and cuddle, jealous at the right place, responsibility, care, protect, help each other in any way, honest, understanding and believing each other.
Forgive me of my sinned. But if i died single; i take the fact and accept as it is.